Rhetorical Questions [The Wedding Story]....by JBoogs

Rhetorical Questions [The Wedding Story]
By JBoogs

Since it is wedding season, I have decided to share one of my favorite wedding stories. I was present at this event. Feel free to ask me questions.

Aren’t small town weddings great?
Have you ever been to a small town rental car agency where they don’t have your reservation because you booked your car online? What about the fact that all types of cars were the same price?
Been to a wedding in a small town in west Texas?
Have you ever planned on arriving at a wedding on time so you did not have to spend much time with the guests?
Have you arrived at a wedding location on time to find 3 dudes hanging out drinking beer at the entrance?
Have you arrived at the wedding location on time to find out that the wedding time has been moved from 1pm to 7pm due to a fight the night before between the bride and the host?
Is it a problem when you and your date are the best dressed/only dressed-up people at this event?
Have you ever hung out in a double-wide while the bride reconciles with the host to have the wedding at its original location?
Have you had your “Spidey senses” tingle so much that you knew the day would only get more colorful?
Is there anything wrong with taking the bride to McDonalds for lunch the day of her wedding?
When was the last time you had to pick up the maid of honor at her house that was a converted motel?  Is a sheet as effective as a front door?
How much should your wedding cake cost?
Should it cost more than my plane ticket? Should it cost more than everything at the wedding except the drinks? Should it cost that much when you are buying it from a local supermarket? Should it have mini water fountain that requires you to buy the battery separately?
Are trailer parks romantic places to get married? What about the backyard of a trailer?
Is the hardcore rap channel on Dish Network good music to welcome guests?
Should guests that people just met be in charge of set-up (chairs, Tiki torches, etc…)?
Have you seen the guest trailer in the backyard used as the dressing room for the groom and his party?  Make sense since the bride and her party were getting dressed in the trailer?
Have you seen the groom and groomsmen in all white tuxedos? In the west Texas clay dirt? Without a hem in the pants? How hard is it to remove red clay dirt from white tuxedo pants?
What would you do if a woman drops off the pastor and asks you to give him a ride back to a town that is 45 minutes away?
What do you like to eat at weddings? Chicken wings? Carrot sticks?  When was the last time you left a wedding hungry?
What do you like to drink? Shasta grape, orange or fruit punch? PBR anyone?
What should the bride and groom have as their special drink?  Alize anyone?
What do you talk about with a pastor for 45 minutes while driving him home?
Did you know that Amarillo Boulevard is world famous for its “night life”? Of course you did?
What do you think when the pastor asks to be dropped off at a gas station on Amarillo Boulevard?
Are you curious about the newlyweds and where they are now?
 
Let’s just say there are no surprises.