Rhetorical Questions [The Wedding Story]....by JBoogs

Rhetorical Questions [The Wedding Story]
By JBoogs

Since it is wedding season, I have decided to share one of my favorite wedding stories. I was present at this event. Feel free to ask me questions.

Aren’t small town weddings great?
Have you ever been to a small town rental car agency where they don’t have your reservation because you booked your car online? What about the fact that all types of cars were the same price?
Been to a wedding in a small town in west Texas?
Have you ever planned on arriving at a wedding on time so you did not have to spend much time with the guests?
Have you arrived at a wedding location on time to find 3 dudes hanging out drinking beer at the entrance?
Have you arrived at the wedding location on time to find out that the wedding time has been moved from 1pm to 7pm due to a fight the night before between the bride and the host?
Is it a problem when you and your date are the best dressed/only dressed-up people at this event?
Have you ever hung out in a double-wide while the bride reconciles with the host to have the wedding at its original location?
Have you had your “Spidey senses” tingle so much that you knew the day would only get more colorful?
Is there anything wrong with taking the bride to McDonalds for lunch the day of her wedding?
When was the last time you had to pick up the maid of honor at her house that was a converted motel?  Is a sheet as effective as a front door?
How much should your wedding cake cost?
Should it cost more than my plane ticket? Should it cost more than everything at the wedding except the drinks? Should it cost that much when you are buying it from a local supermarket? Should it have mini water fountain that requires you to buy the battery separately?
Are trailer parks romantic places to get married? What about the backyard of a trailer?
Is the hardcore rap channel on Dish Network good music to welcome guests?
Should guests that people just met be in charge of set-up (chairs, Tiki torches, etc…)?
Have you seen the guest trailer in the backyard used as the dressing room for the groom and his party?  Make sense since the bride and her party were getting dressed in the trailer?
Have you seen the groom and groomsmen in all white tuxedos? In the west Texas clay dirt? Without a hem in the pants? How hard is it to remove red clay dirt from white tuxedo pants?
What would you do if a woman drops off the pastor and asks you to give him a ride back to a town that is 45 minutes away?
What do you like to eat at weddings? Chicken wings? Carrot sticks?  When was the last time you left a wedding hungry?
What do you like to drink? Shasta grape, orange or fruit punch? PBR anyone?
What should the bride and groom have as their special drink?  Alize anyone?
What do you talk about with a pastor for 45 minutes while driving him home?
Did you know that Amarillo Boulevard is world famous for its “night life”? Of course you did?
What do you think when the pastor asks to be dropped off at a gas station on Amarillo Boulevard?
Are you curious about the newlyweds and where they are now?
Let’s just say there are no surprises.


Happy Baby Daddy's Day!

The entire UR team would like to thank the following four men.  Without you, we would not be here with such a high level of class and style (and a deep appreciation for R+B, rock, salsa, and even hippie folk ish).  Thank you to Mr. Brandon, Mr. Mitchell, Mr. Morales and Mr. Pabon.


**Image is not of the fathers of the UR team.  But its pretty darn dope, right?**


Thank Me Later [review]....by pemora

Thank Me Later ~Drake
by pemora

Its interesting to me that the only song that remotely sounds like a rap song doesn't appear until the end.  I mean, the absolute bitter end.  And the title of that song?

"Thank Me Now"

Well, that doesn't really make sense when you have entitled your hip-hop album, "Thank Me Later", but I'm no rapper....then again, neither is Drake.

Just to be clear - Drake is not an MC.  He is a really cute pop artist who has a very sharp hairline and likes to sing about girls.  Which is totally okay.  But that still doesn't make him a rap artist.

The entire time I was listening to this album, I felt like I was listening to the 20-year-old male version of Sade.  And I'm still not sure if that is a good or bad thing.  Drake has some clever lines, but they are mostly supported by amazing production (you can clearly hear the influence of Timbaland, Swizz Beatz and Kanye) and some R+B-style songs.  In fact, if you are on your 5th glass of wine and have your eyes closed, you would think that Sade herself was singing on "Karaoke".

There were some moments that really had me scratching my head, including his use of the 'n' word.  I mean, homeboy is still white, right?  Are we okay with white people using the 'n' word all of a sudden?  Also, why does Swizz Beatz ever ever ever get on the mic?  I actually think 'Fancy' would be a much better song if Swizz stayed off the mic and left the mediocre rhyming to T.I. (not one of your best, papa. But I'll give you a pass since you just got out of jail and you're probably a little rusty).  I'm also completely and utterly disturbed by the usage of the Aaliyah "At Your Best" sample on 'Unforgettable'.  I am quite confused as to why Tim would do this, but I am one of those people who doesn't step on cracks on the sidewalk.  Some call it brujeria but I would prefer to call it proactive protection.  Don't mess with the afterlife, folks.

Lil Wayne's voice remains the most distinctive in the game and is quite appreciated on 'Miss Me'.  Disclaimer: Lil' Wayne could recite the alphabet and I would give him props. I heart you, Mr. Carter.  And 'Find Your Love' just reminds me of that time in high school when this boy would call me and would recite really corny poetry on the phone to me.  It was really sweet in theory but oh so painful in practice.

My baby daddy just told me that it sounds like I hate this album.  And, I don't.  Its a really nice R+B album for the not-quite-grown and sexy group.  I'm kind of torn on whether to recommend it to you, so if you want me to burn you a copy, holler at your girl.


Happy Boricua Day!

Happy Boricua Day!
by pemora

This has become somewhat of an annual tradition for me...I avoid NYC during the Puerto Rican Day Parade, but I end up at home, watching it on TV, listening to Marc Anthony for hours and sipping a rum + coke. However you spend today, I hope you'll give a moment to honor the Ricans in your life. Even if I am the only one you know.

Happy Boricua Day, mi gente!