LET'S BE COPS!

First movie that had me crying laughing in a long time.  If a picture is worth a thousand words, here’s a few thousand for ya:

This was so remarkably silly.  My herbal friends (those with glaucoma, I mean) would LOVE THIS after taking their medicine - fo’sho.  And all my straightlaced (20/20 visioned) friends would probably laugh almost as much as I did at the sophomoric inane goofiness anyway. 

VITALS

Luke Greenfield (Something Borrowed, The Girl Next Door, The Animal) – Director

Nicholas Thomas (Girls Behaving Badly) & Luke Greenfield - Writers

Damon Wayans, Jr. (New Girl, Happy Endings, and back to New Girl) – Justin  

Jake Johnson (New Girl, Drinking Buddies, Safety Not Guaranteed) - Ryan

Nina Dobrev (Vampire Diaries) – Josie

Rob Riggle (21 Jump Street, The Internship) – Officer Seegars

Andy Garcia (Godfather 3, Untouchables, Oceans 11) - Brolin

Keegan-Michael Key (Key and Peele) – Pupa                            

IF YOU MUST KNOW

Justin and Ryan are 30-somethings who have not quite met their life goals… one, a videogame designer (Wayans) who can’t get his prized game made, and the other, a do-nothing out of work quasi-actor (Johnson) living off an $11,000 herpes commercial check for the last two years.  These two unfortunate bastards find themselves going to what is supposed to be a costume party.  Hence, the title - Let’s Be Cops.  Far too many foolish actions start with us dudes realizing that we might be able to get some from you ladies if we do-X… so we not only do whatever that is, we go HAM doing it.  That’s precisely what started the great ball snowball of wackiness that is this flick cartoonishly rolling down a mountain of silliness and picking up speed all the way to the end. 

When I say the shenanigans ensue, I mean… like straight up all the stuff my friends and I would sooooo do IF we were stupid enough to dress up like cops and walk around the city.  They snatch a joint from a pack of hipsters (and smoke it on the street), indiscriminately yelling “freeze” to people, strolling past the pudgy bouncers at trendy nightclubs…

(dancing at club)

 

But then, Ryan and Justin do a whole bunch of crap that is just plain ridiculous. Stuff nobody in their right mind would be dumb enough to do, like get into a beef with very real gangsters, kidnap a killer, suit up for a gunfight, and worse… rock elbow pads! 

Ryan finds out he loves being a fake cop and Justin finds out that he needs to grow a pair and holla at the very comely (I like the word) Josie (Dobrev) and learn to stick up for himself – despite the fact that he sounds like one of Damon Wayans, Sr.’s white-voiced characters.  Anybody else think DWJ sounded paler than Jake?  

Quick Aside: Nina Dobrev… troubles me.  She’s right on that borderline of making me feel pervy, I mislike that.  Then again, she aint quite over the line, so there’s that... #38YOProblems

Now, usually, I don’t do this, but I have to tell you what other people are saying… Rotten tomatoes only gives “Let’s Be Cops” a total of 9% fresh*** overall. NINE PERCENT!!! WHAT-THEWHAT!!! It’s a C-O-N-SPIRACY (get it? HINT: You, can walk on the moon, float like a balloon. Cuz it’s never too late and it’s never too soon…)

Let me put this in perspective –

Encino Man (that Pauly Shore shart) - 16%

Hangover 3 (those old dudes should already know about Gatorade, son) - 19%

She Hate Me (so does IMTHATDUDE) - 19%

Soulplane - 18%

Showgirls - 17%... I say again SHOWGIRLS!?

Master P’s I Got the Hook Up – 17%

From Justin to Kelly - 10% (they should get that much even if the critics are all named Randy Jackson, dawg)

Forget those critics on RT, you might want to stick with the name you can always trust (UrbanRhetoric, if you were wondering).  I promise you will laugh.  Unless, of course, you really liked any of the movies above - in that case, you’re hopeless and sad… those are some of the dumbest movies I’ve ever scene.  Everyone who has seen these films is a little dumber for having watched them.  I give them NO points and may God have mercy on your soul. (Billy Madison style.)  

Sure, there were a couple of scenes that I could ABSOLUTELY sue them for the psychological trauma of seeing for such an extended period of time (SPOILER ALERT - Why the brother had to be virtually tea-bagged... not cool man, not cool.) Still, despite the ew-scene and some of the lame jokes that miss, overall, I happen to enjoy movies that look like the people making them had a crapton of fun doing it.  Let's Be Cops is that kind of movie.  It wasn't as good as Superbad, but it was pretty funny and since I literally took out my handkerchief to wipe the laughter tears from my eyes, I think it is definitely worth the bread to see it. 

IMTHATDUDE gives Let’s Be Cops: 4

RATING SYSTEM:

5 = You should be about halfway to the theatre by now… Well… GET!
4 = Definitely worth the bread. Niiice.
3 = I won’t cuss anybody out and demand my paper back.
2 = Somewhere SOUTH of under-whelmed./I know it has a pulse, but…
1 = Not a good look. They played me AND I played myself.

***Since posting this, Rotten Tomatoes has more than doubled the critics' rating from 9% to 20% and the audience has it at 62%  #ThePowerOfUR