Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows [review]....by IMTHATDUDE

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part I

With a run time of two hours and twenty –six minutes (give or take a lifetime), I have to say I absolutely LOVED....leaving the theater.  LLLLLOVED IT.  Sweet Baby Jesus - this movie felt like a two hour twenty-six minute stint in a crowded maximum security prison shower with no guards – I’ve never been there, but it’s safe to assume you would really REALLY not like being there, especially if you knew that when you finally got to leave, it wouldn’t actually over yet because there’s a Part TWO! in just a few months.

I know, I know.  The Harry Potheads out there will disagree and chase me down like a finch at a quidditch tournament.  Yikes! Scary thought.  Oh, wait… grown ass people really do that.

Do I have to say it?  I mean… word?  Do I? 

Alas, to the flick deets.  The story is by Paper Stacks (government name “JK Rowling”) and on the keyboard is Steve Kloves (all the other HP’s except Order of the Phoenix, me thinks).  David Yates (Order of the Phoenix, Half-Blood Prince) directs the usual cast of characters, Daniel Radcliffe (aka “Potter. Harry Potter” – is it just me or is that name kinda soft core porn-ish?  Just me?  Emma Watson is Hermione Granger and Rupert Grint is Ron Weasley.  SIDE NOTE: People always make fun of black/brown folks names - what’s wrong with names like “Shamik Tetteh Pabon” – huh, pemora & paj1?  “Rupert Grint” is his real name!  I rest my freaking case. Ralph Fiennes, Helena Bonham Carter, Alan Rickman, and several others are all back for the penultimate HP movie.

IF YOU MUST KNOW:

This is Harry Potter’s seventh jaunt into the film world thanks to JK “Paper Stacks” Rowling who is sick with the pen.  Not that I read any of these books, but I tried to read Chamber of Secrets at a Barnes & Noble bookstore once but I don’t really get into stuff like this – unless, it’s onscreen.  If I’m going to get all cozy with a book, it aint gonna be about a tween wizard playing with brooms and wands.  A-yo!  I’ll pass.  I did read about 12 pages of one of these uber-best sellers from Paper Stack can write her tiny British bum off.

So, Harry reluctantly rallies his crew – Hermione and Ron.  Somehow they are foiled at nearly every turn as the try to find and destroy the mystical Hulcruxwhosiwhatsits. I think I should remind you – if you haven’t read the books or seen the previous flicks SPOILER ALERT ………………………………………………..Again, SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!

I should remind you that Dumbledore is dead as a doornail. For my Latinos - Albus es finito, mi hijo.  (Can you tell I’ve been practicing mi español?)  Voldemort (the villain who sounds like an STD – so let’s just call him VD, shall we?) is pooling his evil resources to effect the takeover of the ministry of magic and then… the WORLD. 

Bwahahahaha!  Who wouldn’t be scared of this face? 

If it wasn’t for Potter, Hermione, Weezy gumming up the works, he’d have an easy go about it to. 

As ominous as Voldemort and his death-eating crew seem, there really are only about 8 of those fools.  Yet, the good guys, who are plentiful, have the strength of a big bowl of puddin’ – more on this later.
So, Harry, Weezy and Hermione get their whosiwhatsit destroying quest under way, but they have to fend off the constant threat of the VD gang.  Long story short, it’s a race against time in this NEVER ending saga of good vs. evil and goody for us, they let us watch it slowly unfold over the course of 6 days (or 2 ½ hours, whatever).

My problem:  Too many good guys not enough bad guys.  Are the good guys that “pudding” or are the bad guys so freaking g’d up that the good guys and all their goodness were simply impotent against them?  That may not be what the books portray, but the movies do.  The book MIGHT explain that, but the movie… sho’ don’t.  I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again before my time on the intrawebs is over – Every movie should stand and feel complete on its own merit.  I shouldn’t need a workbook or companion manual to go along with the film.

Listen, the special effects were very good.  They usually are.  The plot, as an individual movie, was a little weak.  Pretty weeny, in fact.   Again, let me say Paper Stacks is an exceptional writer.  I just couldn’t help the feeling that I was sitting through what was largely a placeholder until the actual movie started.  How would you feel if the coming attractions lasted nearly 2 hours and the movie was only about 26 minutes long?  Well, that’s how it felt?  Me and the throngs of Potheads basically shelled out our doe as the studios maximized the total revenue yield from the Deathly Hallows.

It had so much potential from the outset.  People dying.  Darker tone.  All that good stuff.  Not your little sibling’s Mr. Potter. But then… it just kinda got lame and returned to lame-status quite frequently throughout the one hundred and forty-six minutes of run time.  Potheads unite against me if you will. 

But I’m like Severus.  You aint about to kill me, baby.  Oh… wait…

(PS: JK, I see you. If you’re ever in need a brother to give you some Severus BLACK Snape, holla at me.  I’m kidding.  I just wanted to get my point across about the character names in this series.)

That Dude gives Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part I: 2

RATING SYSTEM:

 1. They make crap this pure?

                                 2. Couldn’t be more under-whelmed.
                                 3. Not too shabby, I won’t ask for my money back.

                                 4. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good./Worth the 12 bucks.
                                 
5. Why are you reading this and not seeing this movie? Jackass.

UR Gives Thanks

Yeah, yeah, we're a day late + a dollar short on this whole giving thanks thing, but blame the coquito-induced coma for our tardiness. Anyway, some things that we are giving thanks for this year:

Photo courtesy of MissInfo.TV

Me? I'm thankful for Kanye West's mental health.  Did anyone peep his ode to Earth, Wind + Fire outfit at the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade? Pure entertainment.  That man has me laughing for days. ~ pemora

I'm thankful Jay-Z's Decoded was only 18 bucks on Amazon.com, because if it wasn't it would have stayed right there on the shelf. Not to mention in one week I've already run into two cute women (bookworms of the non-chicken variety) also reading it at the same time.
~ IMTHATDUDE

I give thanks for super long remixes with every rapper like on Chris Brown's "Deuces" that make you forget about the original song. ~ JBoogs

I'm thankful for rapper names like Wocka Flocka Flame and Wiz Khalifa.  Wait...how do you spell Wiz Khalifa?
~ Paj1

Holiday Wish List (for the ladies!)...by pemora

When I was little, I thought Santa Claus was a cute old white man but never believed that he was the one actually bringing me presents.  I always knew that my parents were the ones hooking me up, so at a very young age I decided I would help them.  Once the Sunday circulars arrived at our house promoting holiday sales, I would gather them all up and create a master shopping list for my parents.  This included a clear description of every item I wanted, with comparison prices at each of the major stores.  For efficiency, I would also highlight the lowest price for my parents, so that they knew which store to go for the bargain deal.

I was such a thoughtful kid.

This habit still lives strong, as I usually tell my husband the 1 or 2 items that I would really like and even email him several links, so that he knows exactly where to buy it from.  Although this removes the element of surprise, I was never one to be left in the dark, so it is always a success.*

*Note: I do have 1 quick admission...the occasional times when the baby daddy DOES surprise me? Always ends up being the BEST gifts and ones that I never ever would have thought of/asked for/seen myself with.

So, here is a little holiday wish list.  For all of you, not me.  I am trying to do this "giving" thing.  But if you buy me one of these items, I would not complain.

Get Your Read On....by pemora

Note: this is not a book review. I have not read either book and I am still debating whether or not I will.  I DO know, however, that I am purchasing the anthology for the baby daddy for Christmas.  And I can say that on this public forum because, as supportive as he is, the baby daddy NEVER reads UR.  Which says a lot about our relationship.  But, alas, I won't go there.

Recently, Dough put me on to this New York Magazine article by Sam Anderson.  Trust me, you need to stop reading UR right now, click on the link and then come back to us.  It will be worth the minute it will take you to read the whole article.

Back?  Okay, I found that article to be quite nauseating (seriously, son, you have never heard of a 2pac song?) and even the idea of two professors compiling lyrics for the anthology has me a bit skeeved.  Let me try to explain -- like the good Dominican mother that I am, I am overprotective of the genre of hip hop.  I quite often feel that it is 'ours' not 'theirs' (lately, my definition of those two words has come to mean a generational difference) and I fight with people over the commercialization of the music.  Of course, I also like me some Weezy, so I am a case in contradictions.  But this is why I can never fully explain my defensive nature when it comes to hip hop.

I am intrigued by the idea of this anthology and wonder what some of my favorite songs look like on paper.  And while I am annoyed that Sam Anderson asked the ultimate hip hop question (who is the best lyricist of all-time), I thoroughly enjoy thinking about it. 

So, will you purchase the book?  What do you think of this anthology?

By the way, while looking this up on Amazon, I came across Jay-Z's Decoded.  After eagerly awaiting its release when I was teaching a course on 90's hip hop last year (see? Contradictions again), I completely forgot that it was dropping this month.  Given that I consider Jay-Z to be one of the best of the best, I might have to purchase this one for myself.

Some background -- the original concept of the book was to explain and give context to his lyrics.  It looks like they have expanded on the idea a little, with Jay-Z also adding some social commentary.

In all, it looks like I am purchasing both books this winter.  What about you?  Any interest in either book?

UR's Top 10 MC's of the 21st Century....by UR Staff

A couple of weeks ago, BET held a roundtable discussion (the only really note-worthy person in attendance was Jermaine Dupri....take from that what you will) discussing the Top 10 MC's of the 21st Century.  The rules, as far as we understood them (can you tell that we didn't actually watch the show?) was to include rappers that started in the last decade, they had to drop an album post-1999, and no groups.  This was their list:

1. Eminem
2. Lil' Wayne
3. Kanye West
4. 50 Cent
5. T.I.
6. Ludacris
7. Drake
8. Young Jeezy
9. Jadakiss
10. Rick Ross

The UR staff got into a pretty interesting conversation about our own top 10 lists.  After a little bit of back + forth, we decided that our list would be:

1. Mos def
2. Kanye
3. Eminem
4. Weezy
5. Talib
6. TI

7. Luda
8. Fab
9. Jadakiss
10. Lupe
Honorable Mention: Little Brother (sadness about the no groups rule)

Cleary, we all felt a bit confined by the rules set forth by BET.  In the end, I think we were all comfortable giving Mos the top honors.  It is interesting to note that we were a house divided on our stance about Weezy (IMTHATDUDE would rather we included Wayne Brady).

Thoughts?  Do you agree or disagree with us?  Anyone you would add/take off?

~UR Staff

Def Jam Rapster [review]....by pemora

As a huge fan of Guitar Hero (I mean, huge. As in, hours upon hours of battling each other with the plastic wireless ugly-ass guitars), I was a wee bit unsure of whether I would like the new Def Jam Rapstar.  Would Rapster do for hip hop what Guitar Hero did for rock?

(let me explain....as a result of the marathon battles of Guitar Hero, I can now walk into any hole-in-the-wall bar and sing at the top of my lungs with my fellow gringos. "Heart-Shaped Box"? Check. "Shout at the Devil?" Check. "Message in a Bottle"? Check.)

So, when my sis gave Rapster to the baby daddy as a birthday gift, I was excited to try it out.  The first thing I noticed was the small size of the mic (no dirty minds, children). As a HHK-veteran, I am used to the weight of a real mic. But, alas, this is HHK for my living room, so I just need to get over out.

Next, I was pleasantly surprised at the selection of songs.  Everything from 'Gin + Juice' to 'Scenario' to 'Get Low' and 'Best I Ever Had'.  Even though there is a nice selection, I would like to see MORE songs included.  I am excited to see which songs can be downloaded.

Finally, this is a fun group party game. Our group of friends each took turns and it was hilarious to see folks perform.  I quickly realized a couple of things:

1. 'Push It' really only has 2 words in the entire song. And some ahhh's in there too.
2. I know every single word to 'Crush on You'.  Every. Single. Word.
3. IMTHATDUDE is painfully shy. Get on the mic, son.
4. Paj1 is so not shy. Did he really perform 'Turn My Swag On' in front of everyone?

All in all, an amusing game.  I'm not sure how long one can stay entertained after running through the list of about 25 songs, which is why I need to look into this download option.  Also, I forgot how entertaining some of these videos are. Seriously, the 'Scenario' video just so reminds me of being a teenager.  Oh, and how much I loved skinny, backpack, Busta Rhymes.

Yours truly performing 'Slam' by Onyx. Yes, in a frilly blouse. I'm a mess.

Bringing Me Back from Shopping Death...by pemora

One person who was quite supportive during my shopping hiatus was Merl over at Clyde's Rebirth.  Not only is she someone who ALWAYS answers my emails/tweets/posts/smoke signals but she constantly has something witty/charming/insightful to say. Not a wasted word from this one.  And she hooked me up with a pretty badass red silk jumpsuit that makes me look like the Latina version of Donna Summer circa 'On The Radio'.  Oh yes, it is THAT badass.

Anyway, Merl is hosting a pretty sick giveaway that I just had to enter.  For more details and to check out her rad lookbook, head on over to Clyde's Rebirth.  Run don't walk.

 

I think this giveaway is just the motivation I need to get out of my shopping rut.  Am Ex, I'm back, baby!